Access Escape: Escape the Mailbox: The Loco Love Tester

You spotted a facebook Ad for a love tester. In one of your weaker moments, you click the Ad. The page loads and explains that in order to use the love tester you should email your name to this address. The bit that really catches your interest on the page is that if you score highly enough it will reveal the name of your secret admirer. You should really know better but you email the address with your name and the result comes back, “Cold Fish”!

Rating: Different!
Completion Time:  ~10 minutes
Date Played: 14th February 2021
Party Size: 1
Recommended For: People who want more interesting emails

I’ll repeat EXACTLY what I said in my review for January’s game: The feel when the wonderful people at Escape the Mailbox release December, January AND February Escape the Mailbox but you decide to play them all in one day rather than one a month like you’re supposed to…

The Loco Love Tester bursts into February with a shower of pink hearts. Ever remember those retro “Love Tester” machines? Nah. Me neither, I’m too young. But I Googled it and essentially they were arcade machines where you’d press a button, or spin a wheel, and the machine would tell you how attractive you are. I also found out there’s a museum in San Francisco that has over 300, but that’s a story for another time I’m sure.

Access Escape have created a very fun (and modern) twist on the idea of a Love Tester – except the catch is, this one has gone loco. After putting your name through it, you come back as a “Cold Fish”. Assuming that’s not right… Your job is to hack the system and find out your REAL love rating. I asked my Player 2 and he laughed and said of course I’m not a cold fish… But I’m 99% sure he’s just being nice because it’s Valentine’s Day.

Fittingly then, the puzzles in this month’s Escape the Mailbox are themed around two things: love, and hacking computers. In solving them I learned some cool things about Unix timecodes, binary and encryption – very cool! I also learned that I am an absolute Casanova and everyone had better watch out (just as soon as I’m allowed out my apartment again, post-pandemic).

Once again, it’s a really sweet little game. I took around 10 minutes to complete it, but typically Escape the Mailbox can take between 10 – 40 minutes. A fun way to spice up your inbox. Heck, you can even forward The Loco Love Tester to your crush this February for a fun laugh.

The technology used is called Puzzle Panther if you’re thinking about making your own. But if you’re more of the puzzle-solving, than puzzle-making type, you can sign up on Access Escape’s website for free.

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